[WARING: this is long and has expletives, bitches, and unless you are an astute and abstract reader that can peer five fathoms deep into subtext, this post has nothing to do with the LSAT or meditation prima facie. Unfortunately, the video is rated G, or TVG, or whatever the fuck the kids use these days.]

I've had a rather difficult time writing about this magic word because I can't properly convey the importance of Yes (read: I'm too dumb to say how fucking awesome Yes is). It would be easier for me to mathematically solve for God. My suggestion to you is that you stop reading this now and just say Yes to anything and everything without reservation for an entire day, morning to night--without once saying No or Why. Leave your experience in the comments below.

But you're as dense as I am, and you're still reading...(sigh)...

Because we have a good thing going (...a thing, anyway), we'll use the same format we did with No and Why: What is Yes? What does Yes do? Are the effects of Yes worthwhile?

What is Yes?

Most simply, Yes is acceptance of events. I find that understanding this is easier with a situation for comparison: 

Yes, No, and Why are standing in the middle of a busy thoroughfare, Yes steps out of the way to allow traffic to pass. No holds its ground and begins shouting at the oncoming cars on the principle of power, risks hurting itself, and consequently fucks things up for everyone involved. Why questions the existence of the traffic and dies in a flurry of lights and metal.

Yes is also acceptance of invitations:

Yes is invited to skydive and does. Yes finds the whole experience rather uncomfortable and terrifying, but at the same time undeniably thrilling and new. Unless another invitation comes along, Yes is not likely to ever do it again.

No is invited to skydive and doesn't. No imagines that the whole experience would be uncomfortable and terrifying. Also, skydiving is risky. No spends his Saturday doing laundry, safely.

Why is invited and wonders at the motives of the person who invited him; he is still pondering what skydiving would mean long after the date on the invitation has passed.

Yes is also acceptance of people and ideas:

At a party, Yes listens to people talk out of their rumps about things they don't know or understand. Yes hears them out, discusses a few points and finds their enthusiasm charming, if misguided. Yes may or may not keep in touch with the people she has met.

At the same party, No interrupts the same group of butt-speakers with phrases like, "no, because...", "well, but...", and "you know what I hate?..." No does not find anyone at this party charming and in fact finds most attendees unpleasant and vaguely threatening. No keeps in touch with no one from the party.

At first, Why is a hit at the party; Why keeps the conversation going like no other attendee. But after an hour or so, people get tired of justifying themselves and their ideas and start making excuses to leave Why's company. One attendee asked Why for his contact information but regretted doing so as soon as Why gave that attendee the third degree.

What does Yes do?

Yes keeps events, action, ideas, motion, rest, life, anything going--indefinitely. Yes also functions as a positive alternative to No:

You're out for a run, but the idea of running indefinitely sounds nightmarish. Instead of thinking, "(No,) I will stop running now," think, "(Yes,) I will begin walking now."

On the surface, it's a minute change. But in the reality of magic words and thought, it's the difference between killing an action (running) and transforming an action into something different (running becomes walking); the action continues, only now it's something new. 

Also, Yes reduces stress and anxiety. Some who are not used to saying Yes will argue that it causes stress; they cite nausea, nerves, sweating, confusion, and a general panic of what saying Yes would mean for future as proof that Yes is stressful. In actuality, these stressful symptoms are products of No and "what if?" They just get really loud when Yes shows up because they know that Yes is going to put a fucking bullet in their ugly heads, and they don't care much for that. Yes answers "what if?" and once "what if?" is answered, it can't exist anymore...and that's scary. Here's an example we can all relate to (insert appropriate gender):

No. I can't call him. What if he thinks I'm creepy or he isn't into me? (Overall anxiety, hand-wringing, and worry are felt throughout.)

Then, before you make the call, you panic, feel queasy, and sweat from your palms. During the call, you don't remember what you say. At the end of the call, you're either elated or ready to get shitfaced. But you're not stressed, or nauseous, or sweaty, or any of that other shit...Yes took care of that.

Are the effects of Yes worthwhile?

Absomotherfuckinglutey. Look at any thing or person in your life that you have ever loved or cared about: At the moment it was breaching the walls of existence, which word do you think brought it to life? Yes? No? Why?

I'm thinking of "I Am the Walrus." The world would be lacking if Lennon had said, "No, that's a ridiculous song. Why would we do something so bloody silly?"

I also look to my friends: Yes brought them to New York, had they ever said, "Moving to New York just doens't make sense, why would I do that?" I'd be much poorer. 

For the sake of all that's holy and evil and possible, say Yes.